Primus Sinister

Bushwhacked

Beaten to the Punch

When Lumiya got back into town, I acted on that three-way plan I had, and that was a hot night. Horns, tails, claws, teeth. That orgy had it all. Let Lord Rexcelsior and Grughuge get wasted to their hearts’ collective content. I’ll take the sex every time.

Every time.

Something about pilgrims with issues cropped up the next morning, and we got roped into helping them out, but as it turned out a few days later, some of them proved to be asshole cultists to Velsharoon. I was pretty sure we’d seen the last of these fuckwits after the last time they fucked with us, but no. No such luck.

We got jumped on the road by a freakin’ army! I guess it would bloody well take an army to bring this crew down, but down we went. I think they were after the Bones of Velsharoon, or something. We were supposed to guard the caravan which was “transporting them somewhere safe.” Yea. Good plan guys. Oh, right. Traitors. I remember now. And no way in hell did I surrender at the end when it was just me and Eve against like half the army. Nope, they were forced to knock me unconscious, ‘cos I was totally fighting tooth and nail right up to the end. Oh, and copping a feel on Eve while we fought. What can I say? Girl’s got a great ass.

We woke up in some half-assed dungeon cell, but once we got our bearings, Eve of Disaster made short work of the lock and we were out. There were some others from the caravan who seemed as surprised as we were. Once we made sure they weren’t Velsharoonies (I’m still not fully convinced), we led them out into the chamber, and tried to figure out how to escape. Before we’d gone too far, some kind of undead ooze killed off one of The Others, and we escaped into a room that, by the gods, had our equipment in it.

Who’s running this two-bit organization?

-The Bae’qeshel

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